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jantare1
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Posted on 11-20-11 11:36
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Enough of Rasika and Mridula's bs, let's talk something productive now....
The question, as the title of this thread says, "HOW DO YOU MOTIVATE YOURSELF?!"
I'm an undergrad, doing well in school and about to graduate. Despite my academic success, I'm not happy with the way I'm moving forward. It seems like I'm moving too slow and taking everything as a burden. I think the reason behind that is lack of motivation. I know I can do much better, use my time in a more productive way but, I'm turning into a slacker. I keep the assignments until the day they are due, I tend to take the tests on the day they end, and I spend a lot of time doing nothing - just sitting in front of my laptop, flipping screens between gmail, facebook, sajha, netflix.
Anyone who has been in similar situation? How did you motivate yourself to not be a procrastinator and use your time wisely? Share your thoughts people. I'm hoping to get some helpful comments.
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goddamn
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Posted on 11-21-11 1:31
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Last edited: 21-Nov-11 03:06 AM
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goddamn
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Posted on 11-21-11 1:34
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Changed a lot in these few years and learnt to work hard and not expect anything in return. I see how much the glass is full rather than how much is left to motivate. I don't see what others got, i see what i have and what can i do to make it better.
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jantare1
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Posted on 11-21-11 2:48
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no_more_crush: amen to your suggestion about getting into activities and making some real friends, definitely need to work on that.
pinpoint: i agree with what you said; i too think planning today what i'm going to do tomorrow and trying to accomplish those goals helps a lot. but haven't brought that into practice yet, will see that helps. but the problem is on the "first study then party" part. i'm not a party person, but these little distractions like social media, boredom, etc are really tough to get over for me. idk, could be because of lack of strong will power.
ihateamerica: you're are right bro. trying to do multiple things doesn't help. it ends up being less productive instead. and i think you are right about the exercise and sleep thing too becausei fee like i've become more lazy and kind of sluggish since i stopped going gym after school resumed in september. i used to sleep 6 hrs, go to gym early in the morning and the day used to be just fine. now, i sleep 7 hours or so, no physical activity and still i'm super tired before the end of the day. alcohol/drugs/cigars are not my thing and neither are the hoes lol.
goddamn: man, looks like you've been through a lot regarding your education and career. and you are right, it's not about what others do and what they have, it's all about you and whether you are happy or not. "I see how much the glass is full rather than how much is left to motivate." really like this sentence bro, makes a lot of sense.
well, these are some really good responses. thanks to all for taking time to write. i'd like to invite others to share their experiences on this matter so that it'd be helpful to not just me, but also to other students/people on the same boat.
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lapid
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Posted on 11-21-11 4:26
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Janterai bro
Its not only you, every person passes thru it at least once in a life time. Some people get a way real quick some people keeps looping around the same mess. Reading your line I could only say u haven’t found your passion yet. Having said that I myself haven’t found yet, so I m your an alter ego as far as this topic concerned but its slowly changing for me now. So many things pops up into my mind, I get infatuated for a while, and it lessen subsequently as the time passes, that’s where I m lacking to find out my passion. Many times I got intertwined in thought n couldn’t wind up to something concrete. Another thing I believe the true cause of not being able to pin point what we need is uneasy anticipation of future. We expect too much from future and put bare effort on present or we put effort on such things which do not interest us and the reason could be we are doing this ‘cause someone else want us to do that. Usually we are so occupied thinking what to do or what if it happens in the future and we forget what we supposed to do at the moment.
So to answer your question is nothing else than your true self can motivate you better, rest only accelerate you to speed up as a catalyst which do nothing if u choose to stay inert. So learn to value yourself, you are the most important person for you. Be cautious about the negative catalyst like jealousy, overconfidence which is simply arrogance, hatred, and negativity as some people here on sajha are trying to put forth. They may call it opinion but I smelt like onion which is very hard to cut thru. And the opposite, appreciation, positivity adore you to stay motivated
I might be the catalyst to you but u r the real motivator of yourself. For me ever glowing smile in the face of my parents and fiancée puts extra vigor and I agree with no-more-crush bro but I wonder how many crush he had in the past.
Steve Job was so true saying this and I don’t mind repeating this again if it motivates you a little bit. “Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.
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Homeyji
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Posted on 11-21-11 6:02
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Jantarei,
Great question. Thanks for starting this thread.
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राछस
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Posted on 11-21-11 8:06
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Happens to me all the time, i feel low on my esteem suddenly without any reason. I might suffering from disorder, but not quite sure. Anyway, to come out of it I
1) Watch Humor (Youtube, books, comics)
2) Stumble Humor, motivation clips
3)Just go for driving ALONE :(
4)Take out my camera and start shooting random
5) Go to the beach and feel the breeze
6)Drink a lot of water and take shower
7)Come to sajha
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behoove_me
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Posted on 11-21-11 8:08
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Last edited: 25-Jan-12 12:59 PM
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Juggy
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Posted on 11-21-11 9:14
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What I think rather is procrastination is part of working, studying and other cultures. Whichever part of life you are in, its kind of inevitable. The more important thing however is to balance between your work and it. At times, I feel like I procrastinate too much, so I too might be looking for solutions at those times. However I have managed to learn some of the things which I want to share.
1- As soon as you get assignment, just go through the questions, I won't say start attempting right then, just go through questions and understand what they are asking. With this, along the time you will find so many things that may help in solving your problem, that when you start them, you will have good headstart.
2- If you think you are spending lots of time online, use that online time to gather some knowledge. See what field are you interested in. I myself am interested in photography, so whenever I start procrastinating, I divert toward the photography related forums, I start looking for pictures taken by masters, look around for good photo blogs, discussion about contemporary photography et al. That way while I am procrastinating too, I am learning something, and I don't feel like I have wasted my time. And when I think I am spending wayy too much time online, I just take my camera and head out for stroll, I take lots of pictures some day, some day I just stroll around.
3- When there is lots of things going on too, procrastination gives kind of break from the monotonous works I would be doing. Last week I had to work on this presentation for a departmental seminar I was giving. I did not have much of works to show because my simulation were not calibrated right yet. so what I started doing, procrastination. But along the procrastination, I found myself building an idea about presenting the presentation on more interesting way, and started writing it down in a paper. I think procrastination kind of helped me that day. When I gave my presentation, everybody loved it. My professor asked for my slides to use in his class. So procrastinantion is not totally bad, you just have to learn to balance it, and maybe learn things or two from it.
If any of you have find way to get over it, please let me know too.
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magorkhe1
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Posted on 11-21-11 9:48
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While I was in college, I have a friend form Bhaktapur.
He told us that eventually he will be taking active part in his family business and I may not need to go to college but without college degree he can choose a bride ( it is a big no no, that is why there are many threads popping up ) , was the only reason for his continuation of his study.
May be major or part of the reason for all the motivations are ”to get a good looking or noble female".
Last edited: 21-Nov-11 09:54 AM
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Homeyji
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Posted on 11-21-11 10:58
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@Pinpoint, you brought up some great points. Yes, perhaps I need to set more concrete long term goals both in my personal realm and career wise.
@Goddamn - dude, can you explain more what you mean by the glass being half full please? I think it's an excellent point.
Guys,
I am going to approach the question a little differently. I feel the question we are trying to ask is: What ultimately makes us lose motivation?
Guys, in general I can totally relate to know what you mean. On some days my motivation is completely flat also. It really worries me. Especially at work, I can't afford to have a 'flat' motivation. But I struggle to find something within me to grab to move myself forward. Sometimes I wonder what is wrong.
I know that whenever I have gone to Nepal and have been in places that are familiar with me--at my home, and have visited with relatives and friends, I get re-motivated. I have felt re-energized. My batteries get "re-juiced" It is almost like I 're-realize' who I am and what it is that I need to do.
I have not understood why this happens when I am in Nepal or around my relatives. Why is it that when I am in places and people I am familiar with in my childhood that I feel so re-energized? It is almost like my body instinctively knows it's place of familiarity. It's almost like being instinctively in contact with people and places that are familiar with turns me on. The place and people around me tell me who I am and what I am supposed to do.
So in that way, I think that living in America for too long can be a problem. In Nepal, your role in society, who you are, what your dharma is, is communicated back to. In America it is not. In Nepal, social expectations is very heavy there and is constantly reinforced on you from all sides. You are very conscious of who you are in family circles and what you have to do to remain worthy of respect. You are aware of your role in the family in relation with everyone--older than you, younger than you and of the opposite gender. There is a very strict protocol.
Through festivals and rituals, all the above is reinforced.
In America, there is no such pressure. Anything goes here. There is so much open-mindedness that eventually you lose your sense of self--and your motivation. That is how I feel.
You cannot be everything to every one and identify with all things in all places and still hope to retain your core pure self that you had when you were a child. That is how I feel.
Last edited: 21-Nov-11 12:06 PM
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Homeyji
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Posted on 11-21-11 11:20
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If I were to give an analogy to explain what I am saying above, this is what I would say.
It is like Nepal, my relatives, my childhood friends, the neighborhoods I grew up around, the smell and taste of Nepal, all these things are like magnets. And within me, are pieces of iron. And when I go to associate with all the above places in Nepal, then the iron in me starts to fuse together. And the fused iron within me starts to get polarized by associating with the outside magnet (all the familiar places of my childhood).
So it is almost like the outside magnet has the power to turn my inner magnet on. This is when I am at my motivational best.
On the other hand, the longer I am living in America, my inside magnet is no longer associated with the outside magnet. Why? Because all the stimulus from my childhood is in Nepal. And so my inner magnet gets weaker and weaker. Gradually my inner magnet starts to disintegrate into iron pieces. And in the course of running around all over the place and associating with all kinds of people and identifying with so many activities I feel I have to do, the iron pieces are jostled all around and spread out within me.
I feel this is when I lose motivation and am at my motivational worst.
Last edited: 21-Nov-11 11:24 AM
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hariyopat
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Posted on 11-21-11 12:34
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This thread is really good. Though I am also the victim of this but here are some I think will do good to someone.
1. Internet is the source of frustration,boredome,slacking and also can be the source of inspiration,good thing if we can use it efficiently. So, what I have decided to do is facebooking twice a day. @ morning while opening laptop and @night while sleeping. If you are tempted to see in between then just tell yourself..'Sunny if you see now then remaining time is 2-1=1". Also I get pretty much lost in footyroom, cnn,bbc,nagariknews,email etc pretty much. I am trying to reinforce it too. Just use laptop for work. Before to complete just one task(30 mins) it use to take hell 1-2-3 hours that was because in-between task ..we just loiter here and there in different sites but may be if we follow this rules, 30 mins task can take 40 or 50 mins max. I think.
2. Second thing I feel is comparing to others. This generates frustration,unhappiness etc. I think we pretty much know what are weakness within us and if instead we try to ammend it ,than that will generate much joy then trying to be someone.
p.s. I myself don't follow above things pretty much but am trying to instead. I think it might be useful for someone else instead :)
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pinpoint
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Posted on 11-21-11 2:43
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For something that i really want to achieve, visualizing success is one of my greatest motivation too. SOmetimes, i like to just lie on my bed and do that. As long as i am putting in sufficient effort towards the goal, i enjoy dreaming about it too, very much.
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goddamn
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Posted on 11-21-11 3:54
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@homeyji Most of us in US are more than average in study (based on personal assumption might be wrong). We expect a lot when we come here but when it comes to reality, it takes awfully long just to graduate. When we see our friends graduate in Nepal, we feel left behind. We tend to compare ourselves with others, we don't see what we got rather stress ourselves with questions as what if I had done that or what if that didn't happen. I am pretty sure that each one of us have a lot of things that other people back home or even here envy on and viceversa. We got to work hard but at the same time we have to take a break to see what we have achieved and what we can do to make it better. Most of us have a very big aim, to work in a big company, own a nice car, and have a faithful wife. I am not saying we can't get it but its too big of a dream to start with. It creates a lot of burden and causes us to stress. To motivate myself, i don't demotivate myself at first. I don't compare other's success with mine rather I celebrate other's success and get back to my own business. I see one class at a time and a semester at most ( its different to plan higher classes). I talk to my close ones on what i achieved ( it makes u feel a lot better). Simply, i see, hear and process what i want. When i see a glass of water, i focus on water than the other empty half. Just my two cents.
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jantare1
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Posted on 11-21-11 10:26
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thank you all for your input. i'm amazed to see that it's not just mine (or some other random college student's) problem; seems like this demotivational devil keeps on hunting you either until you die or until you kill the sucker. i'm glad to know that i'm not alone but at the same time, i'm sorry for hear that you're stuck on the same boat. thanks to lapid bro for sharing those inspirational words. and thanks to everyone else for sharing those tips on how to get back on track.
i think, as couple of you have suggested, i should start talking/sharing about my achievements with my family members and friends (i hardly do that regardless of how big/small my achievement is). hope that'll help me fuel a bit. i agree with your thought on how family acts as a great motivational source; but sadly - no family here in the States; it's a lonley boring life. but, i try to live as optimistically as possible. to cut things short, seems like these are a few things that are demotivational and are on our way to efficient work/success:
- distraction from online media
- home sickness
- imbalanced physical/mental/emotional health
- lack of friends/fun times
so, here's what i've decided to do:
- build will power and refrain from spending too much time online; if i do i'll do something productive like watching educational documentaries, learning something (like photography as somebody pointed out ^)
- call family/friends often, talk about things going on here and there
- drag my lazy a$$ back to gym early in the morning, stay cool and avoid stress
- get involved with people, go to events/games,etc
- set a goal for the day regarding studies (make a map on mind what i'll study and how much) and give my best to achieve that goal
for me, thanksgiving break starts as of NOW because I don't have much to do tomorrow. i'm going to put on test these things i outlined ^ and see if that makes any difference (will update at the end of the weekend). i hope this thread has helped/will keep on helping people like me.
Happy Thanksgiving fellas!
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no_more_crush
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Posted on 11-22-11 12:20
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goodluck jantarei. Hope you will stick with your plan.
just to clarify on one point - since you dont have family here ( as ~ 90% of nepali folks here in USA), you should communicate more with your family back home. Do not feel bored. Even I have my family in Nepal and the suggestion was mentioned in order to fill out that communication gap.
~GooDLuck
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jantare1
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Posted on 11-27-11 9:33
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Update: my plan was quite a FAILURE!
- spent a lot of time on the internet. although didn't spend too much time on facebook and sajha, i did spend a lot of time checking deals on several websites
- watched crap load of movies
- plan to go to gym was a total failure - cold mornings and boring evenings (lame excuses)
- didn't study much - maybe just an hour or so a day (that's like nothing)
- didn't do anything although it was thankgsiving and my roommate invited me to go to his grandparents' home for the dinner
on the bright side,
- communication with family back home was quite good
- spent some time to cook and eat good meal everyday
- played "marshmallow gun-war" yesterday with some people, was a great fun activity
- watched some good documentaries (i feel smarter...haha)
this thanksgiving break wasn't as good and productive as i wanted it to be. but, still....not completely bad. need to improve quite a lot.
how about yours people? how's life? anything good?
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MTEVEREST8848
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Posted on 11-28-11 12:21
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- Cherish the achievements that you have obtained so far. Think positive!!
- Try to mold your knowledge and education into the practical scenario, think of a practical usage and try to implement on it.
- Work with your own hobby project in your home. Play video games instead of facebook which makes your mind working on tackling difficult circumstances. :)
- Try to understand simple things about life, unravel your uneasiness with happiness.
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destination
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Posted on 11-29-11 1:53
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I do not have an opinion really, but just had to mention that this thread is one of the best ever!!! I so much liked the views, suggestions, advices, and comments on this thread that I could not resist commenting on it.
I am myself the biggest example of procrastination, so loved reading the suggestions. I almost procrastinate everything until the last day, and even the last moment unless it is something fun, like movies, games, roaming; I am ready for it within a moment all of a sudden.
I had bought the P90X workout program dvd like 7 months ago. Ever since then, every single day, I think I would start it tomorrow or next week or so. A couple of times, I have started it too, but after a few weeks, I cannot continue doing it. I just get lazy, and motivated in something fun activity. Ditto for the assignments. I keep on thinking that I cant be doing this forever, otherwise I dont see myself going anywhere in the future.
I am in serious need of motivation, and suggestion. As of right now too, I was supposed to be starting an assignment almost an hour ago, but have been loitering eversince. I checked my emails almost twice, visited all the fun sites (movies, sports, news), and got stuck in sajha's thread.
Can somebody at least motivate me to start doing P90X please? All the good thoughts and suggestions are highly appreciated, as long as they are on track.
Thanks Everyone!!!
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jantare1
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Posted on 11-29-11 2:30
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everest, thanks for your suggestions bro. you made me think for a while and after thinking, i started feeling better.
i feel like today's day was much more productive; in fact, one of the most productive days this semester (excluding the days i studied for midterms and stuff...haha) there's no test until next week, but still....did quite a lot today. woke up at 5:30 with a goal to go to gym but it's cold like ice these days so, i decided not to go. at least, i woke up at 5:30 instead of 7:30 like other days. did quite a bit of studying (haven't done that for long time), finished two essays that are due on wednesday! that's like a big YEAH BAABY!! because last time, i procrastinated so much that i finished the essays right before they were due. completed an application for grant, wrote a reference letter which my mentor will approve/change and submit for me.
- on the fun side, watched TV for like an hour, baked some nice n hot chocolate chip oatmeal cookies as "khaja", now i'm going to sleep a sound sleep.
dang, this feels so good; much better than it felt yesterday. still need to work on this habit of checking deals on amazon, peeping at facebook, sajha, and gmail multiple times an hour though. i do almost all of my work - study, homework, etc on my laptop, so it's a little hard to resist.
all i can hope now is keep things straight and not deviate again. let's see how things go on the long run.
destination....learn from a yesterday's lazy fag and today's active ME....haha.
keep things tight bro, the more you let things loose, worse it becomes.
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